Recovering alcoholics and dating
That may mean each spouse initially talking over things with their sponsor or therapist rather than confronting one other, except when it comes to abuse, which should be addressed.The non-addict spouse may have high expectations for long been missed and disappointed when it doesn’t materialize.Drugs smoothed over difficult feelings and situations that now must be faced “on the natch.” can drive these feelings, but early sobriety is not the time to address it.Moreover, if substance abuse started before the addict was an independent, self-sustaining adult, then new skills need to be learned.
” The spouse may continue to “walk on eggshells,” as he or she did , afraid of precipitating an argument or a slip.Still, he or she may watch and worry whether the addict is doing what’s necessary to recover and be intrusive with statements like, “Did you call your sponsor?” or “You need a meeting.”Partners are accustomed to their roles – the addict being unreliable and dependent, and the partner being a super-responsible fixer. The Underdog addict is self-centered and irresponsible, and feels vulnerable, needy, and loved only when receiving.Yet, sobriety destabilizes the status quo, and the longer partners are together, the more their patterns become entrenched. It’s a rocky transition in the marriage or relationship that presents many challenges.Sober or abstinent addicts have their own emotional challenges.